Sometimes, people say “no” just to see how you’ll react… with the FULL intention of saying YES if you act congruent to what you portray.

(Naturally, this isn’t the ONLY reason people say “no”… but it IS one reason)

Picture this:

You’re the smooth talking confident man who’s just laid out a helluva fun time in front of a woman that you’ve just met and have great rapport with.

And then, she blurts out with the “I can’t, I barely know you” or “No way, I’m sure you do this with every woman you meet”.

So what do you do?

Well, if you start backpedaling… you’re def not keeping on the confident route, that’s for sure.

Here’s one thing I’ll suggest for you:

Never apologize or feel bad if someone says no.

Just rephrase and/or smile and make fun of the answer in a lighthearted way. (in a flip the script way of course)

Remember, many times people want to see how you react when you don’t get what you want.

It’s a character thing.

(As an example, if I want to know what a person’s character is like, I take them to dinner and watch how they interact with the wait staff to get a true measure of who the person is)

Put that in your back pocket and pull it out the next time someone “rebuffs” you… and by golly HAVE FUN WITH IT…

Out.

Of course, you’ve got your “experts” in both… and your “pseudo” experts… and your fakers (or the regurgitators).

You’ve got your “this should work in theory but I’ve never tested it in the real world” or “this actually worked once so let me reverse engineer why it worked even though the only reason it worked was because the person it worked on was so desperate for attention…”

(you get the idea)

I guess what I’m saying is… that there are A LOT of ways to skin a cat (literally).

Some things work for some people… others don’t… and vice versa.

I’ve seen guys do things to women that I thought would SURELY make the woman run the other direction. But they didn’t. They’re now married.

I’ve seen marriages that I KNEW were meant to be… dissolve in 5 months.

It’s late and I can’t sleep, but just remember… there is MORE than one way to make things happen. If you’re trying one thing and it’s just not working for you… and you’ve given it your best shot… try something else. There is no BEST person/method for everyone… there’s only the best for YOU and YOUR situation.

(Remember, if your favorite “guru” claims that it’s not working because YOU aren’t doing it right… well… I tend to think that the ease of use/translation of technique comes with part of the plan. After all, you wanted it to WORK right?)

It’s easy to blame the customer for user error.

Of course, we WERE supposed to be making YOU feel better about yourself eventually… at some point… but lets not worry about starting at the beginning.

Okay?

Watch the video… then comment below. We may need to talk about this further.

If you’re an expert on something, and you have a passion about something, then let the world know.

Trust me.

I’ve been to enough seminars (and spoke at a few myself)… to know that if you’re the dude on stage, you’ll have women on you later…

… and it’s just that simple.

Agree? Disagree? Let’s hear it.

In other words, why one “line” or “strategy” may work for one person… but not another.

Initial conditions may include:

- social proof
- her attitude (what happened to her today)
- the way you look (dress)
- physical stature

Initial conditions are IMPORTANT as you’ll soon see.

Just click the screen below to start a particle going. Then, click VERY NEAR where you started that particle to start a NEW particle and watch how they start out on similar paths… but end up going in VERY different directions.

(Oh, and in case you care, this is a Lorenz Butterfly, with two “attractors”. The butterfly effect is a phrase that encapsulates the more technical notion of sensitive dependence on initial conditions in chaos theory. Small variations of the initial condition of a dynamical system may produce large variations in the long term behavior of the system.)

The first one is the fact that guys are getting flustered with a lack of things to say… like they can’t keep the conversation going.

Here’s a hint: Let it die on purpose.

In fact, walk away before you’re supposed to.

Quit trying to “lock in” right off the bat and make her do some work… lol.

Listen, there’s nothing wrong with you talking to a group of women briefly, then excusing yourself to go to the bathroom right when the convo starts to get interesting. Quite frankly, this is actually a dirty trick… and it’s called the Zeigernik effect (people remember uncompleted or interrupted tasks better than completed ones).

If you want to stay on the mind of someone, don’t leave during a logical transition… leave during a point in the conversation when there is still “skin on the bone”… so to say.

Then, just go talk to some other people.

The key is to talk to people just enough to decide if it’s worth your time to go back and talk to them later.

But better yet, this also opens the situation of the woman (women) coming back and finding YOU to finish the conversation.

Remember: How many times have you heard of a woman talk about having “closure”?

Exactly.

Here’s a good way to go about it:

1. Make a no pressure “sweep” through the room. Smiling and saying “hello” to everyone you can. Make a bit of small talk, give some high fives, give reputations by accusing the groups you meet of being out of control….

Think “Meet and Greet”.

2. Which groups seemed fun and worthy of more of your attention. Go back through and chat ‘em up… and keep the Zeigernik effect in mind the whole time. Find a high point to exit out of the convo and move on to the next one.

3. Wash, rinse, repeat.

Now, with this, you’re gonna find that you’ll be able to easily lock in with a woman or group at some point… and the convo flows smoothly.

And, the best part: NO PRESSURE on you… or anyone else.

You’re just meeting people to meet them and evaluating if it’s worth YOUR TIME to come back.

Then, you’re sicking ‘ole Zeigernik on ‘em to hook them to you (remember, a lot of the time, they’ll keep tabs on where you are, which other women notice… sneaky)

Give it a try…

I’m always thinking that I have to write some long as essay for a blog post…

… you know, to get in DEEP to show my verbal kung fu off.

Not really.

BUT, I’m opening up a little category called “Quick Tips”: Stuff you can read or watch really quickly and put to USE just as fast.

So, Tip #1:

==> SMILE at people, for no other reason than to just smile.

Smiling disarms people. They generally smile back or say “what’s up” or “how are you?”…

In fact, I just did it a little bit ago… like 3 times.

I had to go get my plates renewed and as I was standing in line… I looked back and there was a woman behind me.

Not particular great looking… but so what.

I smiled at her (in a “how are you” way, not a sly “I’m a stalker way”) and she smiled back and said “How are you?”

Easy.

I smiled at the lady at the desk.

Same thing.

I even smiled at the old dude sitting in his car as I walked out.

“What’s up? How are you doing today?”

… to which I just winked at him and smiled back… to let him know that things are awesome.

And you can TEASE people off of it too!

So you smile at a woman and she smiles back… you could say in jest “What are YOU smiling all about?”

… and then she might say “Hey, you smiled at me first!”

Insta opener.

Stop walking around in a funk and smile at people. It’s quick, it’s easy, and it says “I’m a good dude.”

More “Quick Tips” to come… and quit making things so damn hard, McFly… lol