Your Word Selection: The Icing On The Cake

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Poop.

Doo Doo.

Shit.

Crap.

Pound for pound, all of these words mean the exact same thing.

Excretement.

However, what FEELINGS do you get when you say each one of them. Don’t some sound worse than others.

Don’t some sound a little more “child like”?

You see, certain words have the high octane power to laser in on a particular emotion… if used correctly.

How about this?

I took my car to a place about 5 years ago because it needed a new alternator. Now, our “villain” (the car guy), did his routine and checked all of my fluids, pressures, etc during the replacement process of the alternator of my car.

I get a call early the next morning:

“Mr. Howard, did you know that your transmission fluid was CONTAMINATED?”

“What? What does that mean?”

“It means that there’s all sorts of GRIME and SLUDGE in there… do you want
us to change it out for you?”

“Uh… sure.”

Now, if our gentleman had called and said that he thought that my trans fluid
was dirty… or even OVERDuE… I probably would have let it slide.

(Cause you let things slide when money’s tight… lol)

But he didn’t.

He used “contaminated”.

And I have to confess, it put me in a whole different mindset… and he made out like a bandit in the process.

Here’s one that guys use…

“Let’s go on a date.”

or

“Let’s hang out.”

Potentially, they mean the exact same thing. However, one has a more low key feel and one has more pressure built in… like a decision has to be made at the end.

Here’s a quick rule of thumb, when given the choice between using two or more different words or phrases express something… use the one that lasers in on the particular FEELING that you want the other person to have.

It’s not about SIMPLIFYING or dumbing down your speech… although you don’t want to talk over people’s heads… because then no one wins and you look like a pompous bastard…

… no… it’s about communicating EFFICIENTLY and EFFECTIVELY… in order to illicit the response that you are looking for.

Oh, and as an extra… when you get the right words in place… you don’t have to worry about “SELLING” what you’re saying as much.

Think about it.

When the guy told me that my fluid was contaminated… I think that just about any tone would have gotten the point across, and in fact, if he had OVER SOLD the fact, instead of saying it in a “by the way” type tone, it might have LOST it’s effect.

So let’s play a game:

Let’s look at some words and phrases that you can substitute:

For blowjob, or dick suck, or lick my cock… you could call it a “mouth hug”…

Hell, women LOVE hugs… who wouldn’t give you a mouth hug. (credit: Ron White)

For kiss, or give me a kiss, or can I get a kiss…

How about “some affection” or “give me some affection there”

If you want to be playful about sex… or talking about sex:

Instead of “If you keep lickng my ear like that, I’m gonna fuck the shit out of you…”

… which might put you on the short end of the stick…

Say something like “If you keep licking my ear, we’re gonna be bumming monkeys in like… 30 seconds.”

If you want to express how fast a place filled up… instead of saying…

“Man, this place just got PACKED.”

You could say…

“Man, this place just went ZERO TO SIXTY in no time”

The difference here is that “0-to-60″ quickly tells a story (ie, it went from nothing to something very quickly) to which someone can relate to.

This is just the tip of the iceberg.

In the next few days, I’ll flesh this out a little more and give you a few more phrases and words for you to try to substitute into your vocabulary to keep you from scraping the bottom of the barrel with women.

Once you can effectively hone in on the words and phrases that laser in on emotion, building rapport is like stealing candy from a baby.

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