“A fair exterior is a silent recommendation” – Publilius Syrus
I was working out in Dallas this past week with my friend Brad Jackson when we started discussing one of his most frequent support emails:
“Why Do Women Test?”
And although this isn’t advice I really “sell”, it is something I “get” so let me fill you in on our conversation because I think it will help to shed some light on a LOT of areas for you.
First, “why women test”
Imagine I walked up to you and handed you what seemed to be a large 3 carot diamond. Now, no matter what, in the absence of any other decision making stimulus, (like knowing the guy is a diamond expert, etc), what do you do?
YOU GO TEST IT!
Because diamonds are EASY to fake.
Think about that for a second, because it’s important.
Listen, women aren’t the only people that “test” you in your life. Other men to it too.
And, the main reason is most of the “indicators” of status, confidence, wealth, etc…
… can be FAKED. (Everyone knows to “put your best foot forward” and “fake it ’til you make it”)
Here’s something else to think about.
“Fitness” levels are HARD to fake. You can’t really fake good muscle tone, just as you can’t fake lower levels of bodyfat. (you can use drugs to augment, but it’s not fake)
And, good looking bodies are perceived to be healthy bodies.
Another thing to consider:
People with better looking bodies get tested LESS.
(Also, once you improve your body and get that lean, muscular physique, your wife and/or girlfriend will nag you less… sounds weird, but it’s true. I think I’ll have to explain why this is another time)
Yes, I do realize that I’m making a big claim here.
But here is the gist of why this is.
No one makes a decision in a vacuum. People use other relative stimulus to figure out what to decide when a decision has to be made.
And, most times, other external factors can give a good insight into who you are as a person (ie who your friends are, common friends, etc).
However, since most of the factors that YOU yourself control can be FAKED, there has to be a way for another person to test your AUTHENTICITY.
In other words, they need to see if the person you SEEM to be is really WHO YOU ARE.
(It’s like her saying “Really?”)
There’s an incongruence there that just doesn’t make sense.
This is why having a great looking body matters.
You get tested less. MUCH LESS.
Because, in the other person’s eyes, it all makes sense. It makes sense that you’re confident because you look like you should be. It makes sense that you seem to have you life together because it LOOKS like you should have it together.
Remember, having a lean, masculine body is HARD to fake, and that’s why it is so valuable from an “indicator” standpoint…
… which leads me into point 2.
The Indirect Effects Of Getting a Lean, Masculine Body Are More Potent Than the DIRECT Effects Of Other Self Improvement ‘Products
Case in point: Confidence
You could buy a product on how to increase your confidence levels, learn a few new “bandaid” approaches to fake confidence and self esteem…
… or you could get in better shape and have your confidence levels rise NATURALLY.
You could buy a product on how to overcome women’s “tests”…
… or you could get in better shape and not get “tested”.
Listen, according to psych research, your overall self esteem and self worth are tied to 2 MAJOR threads:
- Your perceived status level
- Your perceived physical attractiveness
In saying that:
I’ve trained sales people that have seen a DRAMATIC increase in closing percentage once they got in better shape.
I’ve listened in as guys have told me that they are now confident enough to actually USE a lot of the self improvement material that they’ve learned now that they’ve gotten in better shape.
I’ve seen guys completely REDISCOVER themselves and REDISCOVER their MARRIAGES just by getting in better shape.
(Partly because the woman can respect and admire him again… and show him off to friends, partly because the MAN HIMSELF feels respectable and admirable again)
I have to confess, I’ve been asked time and time again to put out products on influence, picking up women, status, etc and I’ll tell you straight out… the reason I haven’t isn’t because I can’t teach it…
… it’s because getting THIS AREA of your life handled will often get more of the other areas handled as well… naturally.
Is it the perfect answer?
Of course not.
But I’ve seen the raw power this can have on a man’s life.
MY QUESTION TO YOU: What are your experiences on this?